Not everyone has the holiday spirit this year. Granted, it’s hard to really grasp the true meaning of Christmas when you’re constantly assaulted with countless display of “must-have” items, or the latest bargain sale. If you don’t have such-a-such, your Christmas (or whatever holiday you celebrate) will be incomplete!
Nowhere for me is this more evident than a homemade sign scribbled with black marker posted on the back of someone’s car on the highway:
“Contact XXX-XXX-XXXX to get the latest TMX Elmo. Don’t break your little ones’ hearts on Christmas day by not having this toy!
Ummm…ok. I did feel a twinge of guilt… I had better come up with some crazy dollars before the little ones check into the heartbreak hotel. So is this what Christmas is resorted to? Where’s the goodwill among fellow men (and women)? It sure isn’t at the parking lots on the last day of shopping before Christmas. I can see why a lot of people aren’t crazy about this time of year.
But recently, I came across another sobering reason why some people just aren’t in the mood to celebrate. What if someone you loved recently died? Maybe this year, two years ago, or even 20 years ago…but the grief and the sense of loss is still prevalent? When the holiday spirit is constantly shoved down your throat like a bitter pill, where can you go or who can you turn to? There are services out there called Blue Christmas Services.
So like I said, Christmas isn’t all red and green. It can be very blue without the loved ones around. Instead of counting your worth by how many presents you received, how about cherishing the time with the folks that you love and those that love you back? You can always replace items, but not people. The next time I see a sign that says don’t break your little ones’ hearts by not getting this toy, I will remember that my little ones are happy anyway because I’m around.
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People totally miss the point of Christmas. It has turned into a commercially focused, materialistic holiday that adds unnecessary stress to many families.
It made my stomach turn when some conservative christians protested when some store chains decided to leave Christmas out of their promotions in favor of a generalized Happy Holidays. Really– why would religious people wearing Santa outfits that have nothing to do with their religious beliefs protest the need to commercialize their holy day? Where’s the logic? Where’s the decency?
I take Christmas as a day of remembrance of loved ones who have passed, celebrating the loved ones who are alive, and treasuring our faith in God– not as a deadline for exchanging gifts and keeping tally of what we got from whom. In fact, if I have a family eventually, New Year’s Day is when gifts will be exchanged. Christmas will be free of any commercial nonsense and the sales after Christmas are just amazing.
For past 20 years, I no longer bother to buy presents for anybody. I somewhat enjoy observing shoppers in their own desperation to buy someone a present. I simply have a quiet dinner and treat myself wonderfully with decent food
I second you, Tim about the misconception of Christmas holiday turn into the overly commericalistic, instead of celebrating Jesus of Nazereth’s birthday. I still enjoy the holiday spirits when people are on their best behavior and show the real humanity - compassion and sense of delights, etc.
Our New Year Day celebration is still misapporoniated as the beginning of the new year. The Romans celebrated their New Year in the fall (autmun), not January 1st. The Romans celebrated the bountfiul harvests. That’s why some people do detox (body cleansing) like us change the vehicle oil every six months. Fall and springtime for the detox cleansing.
RLM
RLM:
I’m curious if you could provide the sources for your statement in regards to the Romans celebrating their New Year in the fall. Having studied ancient civilizations for many years, I have never been aware of the Romans doing so - in fact it is my understanding that they originally celebrated the New Year in the spring (as did the Babylonians), until Julius Caesar developed the Julian calendar around 50 BC…thus establishing January 1st as the beginning of the New Year.
It was the CELTS who celebrated the New Year in the fall - ushering it in during the feast of Samhain, which took place at night on October 31st. To this day, there are still those of us practicing “the olde traditions” who still honor November 1st as the beginning of the new year.
Virginia Beach, I will look up for the source on Romans celebrating their New Year’s Day in the fall. I apparently will enclose by Wednesday evening. Okay? Thanks for pressing me on the source of Romans’ holiday celebrations. :)
RLM
RM,
You might have mixed up the facts of Romans’ New Year Celebration. You should have surfed the facts via the Internet.
When the Romans came to power, they continued to observe the new year in March, in the springtime. However, the Roman calendar frequently changed based on the wishes of various emperors, and it eventually became unsynchronized with the sun. In an effort to restore a static calendar, the Roman senate declared January 1 as the official beginning of the new year in 153 B.C. Despite this law, emperors continued to tamper with the calendar for over a hundred years. It wasn’t until 46 B.C., when Roman Dictator Julius Caesar created a new calendar, that January 1 was again recognized as the start of the new year. At this point, the calendar had been altered so much that Caesar was forced let the year drag on for 445 days in order to synchronize the calendar with the sun again. http://www.birthdayexpress.com.....arsDay.asp
When the Romans came to power, they continued to observe the new year in March, in the springtime. However, the Roman calendar frequently changed based on the wishes of various emperors, and it eventually became unsynchronized with the sun. In an effort to restore a static calendar, the Roman senate declared January 1 as the official beginning of the new year in 153 B.C. Despite this law, emperors continued to tamper with the calendar for over a hundred years. It wasn’t until 46 B.C., when Roman Dictator Julius Caesar created a new calendar, that January 1 was again recognized as the start of the new year. At this point, the calendar had been altered so much that Caesar was forced let the year drag on for 445 days in order to synchronize the calendar with the sun again.
http://www.amandote.net/newyears.html
RM, methinks that you need to set up an appointment at SPA for waxing off your fur off your body…
Actually, there is another date to ponder. Back in the early Middle Ages, under the old calendar system, the first day of the year was April first. The Catholic church decided to adopt the Gregorian calendar, and adopt January first as the first day of the year. Those “die-hards” who preferred to stick with April first as the official new year were called fools, thus the beginning of April Fool’s Day.
I second Virginia — where did you get that information about the Romans?
I do not have any chance of looking for sources where I read somewhere about the Romans celebrating their New Year’s Day in the fall. I will do that when I have some substantial time.
Mookie, you seems know me personally. Why should I remove the God-given chest hair? If my hairy body really bother you. You ought to foot the spa or hair removal bill. Comprendo? I really feel very blessed to be a real man with hairy chest. You probably are jealous of me having the chest hair. LOL!
I never look down on guys, who do not have chest hair or urge them to get some chest hair. Everyone come beautifully in various body features. Nobody’s perfect! Smile!
Are we in the 80s again which the society at large fixate on smooth-chest guys? I rather go back to the 70s when the hairy chest consider very sexy. Same thing with the late 90s and present 2000s. Woofy!
Robert L. Mason (RLM)
Hello everyone,
I am not a Christian so I am curious how did the gift-exchanging start at X-mas time? I am sure this tradition did not start at that time when Jesus was alive or even shortly after he left. And what was the original purpose of gift-giving? Anyone know this history? Should be interesting!
Happy Holidays to everyone, by the way. Drive safetly during the New Year weekend!
Hello Rose ~
My understanding of gift-exchanging is that while many people tend to believe it started with the Magi (the Three Wise Men) giving gifts to the Christ Child, historical documentation indicates that gift-giving began long before the time of Christ.
We do know that gift-exchanging was part of the Roman celebrations of Saturnalia, which was their festival of Midwinter, occuring around the same time as modern-day Christmas. In fact, many of the current traditions of Christmas can be traced back to this ancient festival.
The festival of Saturnalia took place for several days in mid-December, from around Dec. 17th to the 24th. It began with the public sacrifice of a young pig in the temple of Saturn (for whom this festival is named), and the exchanging of gifts such as candles - symbols of the eternal light which were known as cerei, and terracotta dolls known as signillaria.
At the same time, another Roman festival was the festival of Strenia, a woodland goddess - in which people would exchange branches cut from trees in a sacred grove, and which were thought to bring good luck.
Saturnalia continued to be celebrated up to the fourth century, when it was moved into January (as part of the adoption of the new calendar and the new date of the New Year, as mentioned above), and became part of the festival of Kalends, which is still celebrated in some format in parts of Europe. Kalends became the time of gift exchanging, and decorating the house with candles and greenery.
In fact, there are some cultures that still believe in giving gifts not on Christmas, but on Epiphany - the Twelfth Night - celebrated on January 6th.
I suspect that the concept of gift-exchanging actually started with the giving of “sacrifices” and the like to the ancient gods of Midwinter, in order to request and celebrate the return of the sun, which of course happens with the Winter Solstice on December 21st - after which the days start to get longer (i.e. the “birth of” or “return of” the sun). This wasn’t just a spiritual thing, it was also a matter of survival…depending on where you were located, this was a harsh time of the year, and these early peoples depended on that sun and the changing seasons for the very sustenance of their lives.
Over time, these gifts to the gods evolved into giving gifts to one another.
Hope this helps…the whole history of the Midwinter celebrations and how they have evolved over time is a fascinating topic! I just finished teaching an on-line course on this very subject…
Virginia:
Thanks for posting this very absorbing comment! I actually learned some things…
I would be interested in reading just how Christmas became the insanely commercialized holiday it is today. I feel that is one reason why Blue Christmas services started popping up because there is no real HUMAN interaction and goodwill, especially for those suffering from grief/loss.
On a side note, anyone got TMX Elmo I can buy off of? Winks.
Virginia Beach, Mookie and Chris Kaftan,
I could not locate the particular Roman holiday celebration for the New Year’s Day in the fall. I will keep trying to find out where I get this material on the usual celebration for the beginning of new year due to the thanks for bountiful harvest.
I will try my best to pinpoint the source regarding the celebration of New Year on seasonal change, not during the wintertime.
So people could adjust their bodies during the seasonal change, etc.
RLM
Hi Vikki ~
Thanks for the kind words…and if you or anyone learns something from my comments, that’s great!
Actually, I had wanted to post an apology - it seems that every time you post one of your blogs (which are always interesting and well-written), someone like me comes along and butchers the true meaning of the dang thing by going way off into left field with comments that have little to do with what you’re actually trying to say.
I’m sorry.
I do think that you have done us all a great service in reminding us that holiday season indeed isn’t always red and green…that many of us do struggle through this season - including yours truly.
While I do have cherished memories of childhood Christmases (including the time when I actually did receive a PONY for Christmas), as I have gotten older, I’ve lost much of that Christmas spirit. My grandparents - who were big celebrators of Christmas - have passed on, as has my father. My mother is battling terminal cancer, and naturally cannot and does not do much during the holidays. I’m single and pretty much on my own (no children or even neices/nephews), and honestly don’t maintain a strong relationship with my family any longer - part of the consequences of being the only deaf person in an all hearing family.
So yes…I do get those Christmas Blues. It’s not always easy to get through this time of the year.
And as you said, it’s not made any easier by how “insanely commercialized” it has become today. How and why has this happened?
Sigh…I wish I could provide a simple answer to that one. I think we as a society have become victims of our own success. And instead of appreciating where we have come in the last 25 - 50 years of relative prosperity, we have just turned into greedy, self-absorbed, gimme-gimme ********.
When we should be reaching out to others, we reach out to our computers instead. When we could be holding someone’s hand, we hold our cell phones and pagers instead. When we should be asking “how are you doing?” we ask “what can you do for me?” instead.
Are we truly better off?
And also to add to the above blog comment, we are also victims of “registered” lists for weddings, birthdays, etc. What happened to “giving from the heart”? People think it is important to receive certain brand of gifts just simply because it matches a room, sofa, etc, and it would be a hassle to exchange it for something else or “sell” the gift to get something better.
At my wedding reception, I had put down on the invitation cards: No gifts please. I felt I just wanted people to come and enjoy themselves. Yet some of them did bring gifts which were from their own hearts. My sister’s wedding invitation had said instead of gifts, to please donate to charities of their choice. Nice gesture.
Virginia Beach, that’s why we increasingly dehumanize our existence thru overdependency on technology real often. More people are not spritually or emotionally satisifed due to the use of artifitical stimulation (ex. Internet use).
People nowadays seems engage in social cocoon(s) among themselves than being neighborly or socially gregararious or reaching out socially to the given community.
What is like to be deaf in the 21th Century? Increasingly social and cultural isolation thru the excessive use of Internet and email correspondences. That’s what same happened with the emgerence of telephone in the first place. Many people constantly complain how intrusive and impersonal the telephone in their homes.
Robert L. Mason (RLM)
That reminds me - ever notice how news reporters usually drop a line regarding the highest occurrence of suicides in a period of time is ’round the holiday season?
Even retail therapy can’t take care of people who are struggling with a inner void! /sarcasm