It is indeed, a small, mad world out there. I can only imagine how Britney must be feeling these days. The whole world’s watching her and her next move. Granted, the girl might be a bit crazy. but if you were in her shoes, what would you do?She was shunned for having her kid with her in the driver’s seat. Everyone knows that was dumb, but with the paparazzi after her, she was probably scared and didn’t know what else to do. I don’t blame her for doing something that stupid because everyone knows, you do stupid things in the heat of the moment. Everyone has accused her of child abuse because her kid has a couple bruises. They’ve *gasped* when she tripped and almost dropped her kid. She was probably flustered and couldn’t keep her balance. The paparazzi was after her! You do know kids do get hurt? It’s human nature!

And her next crazy act was to shave all her hair off. Now, what girl has not thought about shaving all her hair off? There’s got to be something empowering about doing something like that. I have had had the urge to tell someone, just shave it all off! (Even Elia from Top Chef did it…and she looked good doing it.) However, I would’ve liked to see Britney shave it all off and rock it, own it, be it. Yet, she didn’t do any of those things.

I almost feel bad for Britney. She’s got the whole world watching her. However, it’s not that she didn’t ask for it. She’s the one who wanted all that fame and glory. She wanted to be the next Madonna (let’s put it this way, Britney is going down in history as Britney, and no one else). She wanted kids at a young age. And now she can’t handle the pressure of all the fame, fortune… and a crazy life style. She had to know her life would be a bit crazy because everyone wants to know her, everyone wants to be her, everyone wants to see what she’s like. Would you be able to handle it?

But you know what, all the mistakes she’s made, who hasn’t made them? Who hasn’t had the urge to say, hey, can you watch the kids for a couple hours while I do my thing? (Yes she went a little crazy doing her thing…I’ll admit that). Who hasn’t fallen in love, over and over again (granted she took it a little too far and married a little too quickly, she’s Britney!)? Who hasn’t wanted to just go, you know what, I don’t care what other people think…she’s done it. I’m glad someone’s had the guts to say, Look Britney, pull yourself together. Hopefully she will.

I might think she’s crazy, but she is human.

This brings me to my point (yes, I’m making a point), we thrive on gossip. Whether or not we admit it. We thrive on it. Whenever we see someone mess up, we talk about it until it’s dead and done. We like seeing someone mess up because it makes it okay when we mess up. Secretly, I’m even glad when my own sisters mess up, I can go *yes!* that makes it okay when I mess up!

When it comes to the deaf community, it’s even smaller than any of us realize. I know we’re always saying, wow, what a small world! We’re all connected by six degrees, although I think the deaf community is separated by two degrees.

See, I never realized how small the deaf community was since I was mainstreamed from sixth grade until 12th grade. And during that time, I was always known as “Sarah’s sister”. When I went to college, I thought, “Finally, I can be anonymous. I can be who I want to be.” I was wrong, dead wrong. I kept getting, “Oh you’re Sarah’s sister!”

Yeah, is that a good thing or a bad thing?

It was a small community at college, I just never realized the full extent of the deaf community until I stepped foot in DC. It’s that small of a community. Everyone knows everyone. Sometimes it’s nice to know that someone knows someone that you know. And they like them as much as you like them. But then you realize it isn’t the easiest thing either because everyone’s bound to know your business. Though there will be some people who manage to stay under the radar, and there will be others who are prominent.

Not only that, it feels like the deaf community has gotten a lot smaller since the blogging world has exploded. It’s crazy. Luckily, I’ve still managed to keep a low profile despite this blog. It’s not easy, always having to watch what you say, what you do, what you feel. But I do feel like without this blog, I’d still be questioning whether or not if what I think is okay or not. It’s tough putting your voice out there when you know there might be some people that won’t agree with you, or people who might say things about you, even if they’re true or not.

I know I’m guilty of being part of the gossip. I’ve done it, one time too many. I even talk about people I don’t know…especially from those reality TV shows (like the Real Housewives of Orange County, and trust me I’ve formed an opinion of some of those people that I shouldn’t even have an opinion of!). Who is not guilty about talking bad about a good friend behind their back just because you’re feeding off the energy of those around you.

It’s tough. You walk into a small community. You have to watch what you say, what you do, and who you’re with. How do you get around that? How do you manage to keep sane? If you’re a prominent figure in the community, how do you get around the fact that there’ll be moments where you just want to say, you know what, I could care less right now?

I feel like I’ve managed to stay under the radar. I’m not quite anonymous, but my life is my life. I’m aware of the fact that I don’t want to be a prominent figure in the community. I don’t mind having a voice, but I couldn’t be in the public eye all the time. I wouldn’t be able to deal with the fact of having to watch what I say, watch what I do, watch who I’m with at all times. It’s not easy. which is why I say, maybe people ought to ease up sometimes. Everyone messes up sometimes, they’re just not being watched under a microscope.

What would you do if you weren’t so anonymous and everyone had something to say about you?