I first discovered blogs when I was living in Sioux Falls. It was around the time I started to realize that I couldn’t spend any more Saturdays at the same antique store, eat any more aged Stilton from the only cheese place in town or walk through the same museum for the zillionth time. I was also exhausted by my own navel-gazing so it was thrilling to stumble across the minutiae of someone else’s life, especially if it named names (we’re not supposed to admit it but we all know we like this stuff).

At the time, reading blogs fulfilled a need I had for stimulation and I know they continue to fulfill a variety of needs for people. I felt as if I had discovered this whole new world full of information I had never been privy to. It was exciting but at the same time, it was weird to read all of these things about strangers. As time went by, my feelings changed from wonder to “Oh my God, I can’t believe she said that!”

I was asked to blog as the National Association of the Deaf Miss Deaf America. I think I was the first one who was required to blog and in some ways I’m glad to have this as a record of my experiences but at the same time, knowing that this blog was one of the most popular aspects of the National Association of the Deaf website was unsettling.

I was very naive when I said yes to the people who wanted me to represent South Dakota in the pageant. It didn’t occur to me to consider the possibility that I’d win the whole she-bang and become public property. I never sat down to think about what it meant to become a public figure in the deaf community and how it would put my being out there for people to pass judgment on. I’ve become more private in the past two years, partly because it’s easier to become lost in a big community such as in DC but also out of necessity. I don’t like having my life out there for people to comment on (yes, I know I’m blogging about this now and bringing it on myself).

I’m ambivalent about reading blogs by people I know. Blogs are a nice way of keeping up with people and their lives but there are times when I’d wonder about what it means when someone publishes intensely personal and colorful experiences for the world to read, especially in such a small community as ours.

As a person who had to live with a smile plastered on her face for two years and endure being called out for not throwing open her closet and inviting the world in for a tour, I do wonder why anyone would even want to put herself out there.

What do people derive from telling the world (as opposed to a journal or a shrink) about their lives? What does this say about us? How do you think blogs have changed the deaf community? Lastly, what does it mean to be a public figure in the deaf community and why do people feel it is okay to be a Tuesday morning quarterback?

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