A trip to your local grocery store is bound to bring you the necessary items you need for cooking your meals.

A recent trip to the local Safeway found me stratching my head in disbelief. In the dairy section, there was this:

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Cheese cut into pieces. The first thing I thought was: WTF…cheese? Who’s the dumb f^(% who thought this up. Can’t someone cut a block of cheese and sprinkle the pieces on salad? This is so low-class.

Then it dawned upon me as I looked down the same section. There were many, many, many products designed to save people’s time in cooking and preparing meals. In other words, America has gone lazy.

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Gone are the days where people get strips of bacon from the butcher. This is already cooked.

cereal bars

What happened to family breakfasts where the parents sit with the children at the breakfast table, eating a bowl of cereal. Here’s cereal bars with artifical milk. Well, that’s so nutritious! Not!

charcoal

Need to do the great American tradition of barbecuing? Go and get some charcoal! Wait? Pressed of time? Just light the bag (yes, the charcoal bag) and your biscuits will be gray and hot in 10 minutes!

cut chicken

In a hurry to prepare a chicken dinner? Just grab a bag of these cooked chicken pieces. They’re even seasoned and marinated!

easy cheese

A tradition in the ’80s and ’90s and apparently still today, cheese on crackers. Easy. Now, what’s wrong with putting slices of cheese on the crackers. Why spray disgusting processed cheese on crackers?

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Now, a new favorite. Just pop the bag of uncooked noodles into a bowl of water into a microwave, when done, add cheese mix. Viola!

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Now, what’s up with this?

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No time to cook your own fajitas with peppers, tortilla wraps, sour cream, tomatoes? Just get the “No-Fuss Fajita” kit! That makes us all lazy!

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And, add the ground beef, already cooked! There, you have your completed meal in less than 5 minutes!

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Don’t have time to dip your tortilla chips into guacamole? Just pick up the chip already smothered in guacamole. Heart attack, anyone?

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Imagine this: You’re behind in getting the financial report to your boss and it’s 1:40pm. Hungry as hell, you decide to pop one of these in the microwave. Hunger gone, report completed on time. 7 grams of fat, but definitely not homemade.

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A kid’s favorite, but loaded with sodium. Have you seen the nutrition label on one of these? I refuse to let my daughter eat these! Clever advertising, though. Not sure if you can see it, but there’s Superman Returns on the top left box.

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Gone are the days of hours spent in the kitchen, watching mom knead flour, salt, water, eggs into dough and adding baking poweder, and chocolate chips. All you gotta do is take the cookies out of the package and dump them on the cookie sheet. 7 minutes later, warm, chewy cookies.

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My family has our MFTs (mandatory family time) on Sunday mornings. We have homemade pancakes with the secret Kaftan recipe of different connotations mixed into the pancake mix. With this, all you gotta do is dunk a mini pancake into a syrup package and you got a treat!

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Now, this I like — eventhough it takes away the elbow grease — it’s a Mr. Clean Magic Reach, which will scrub countertops, bathtubs, and even toilets. Saves time, but reduces the need for elbow grease.

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My wife will kill me. She loves pink milk. I’ve never seen a pink cow. A chocolate cow, yes, but not a pink. What’s wrong with getting the milk and pouring in strawberry syrup or chocolate syrup in it and stir? With less wrist and arm action and just a few shakes, you got the same thing.

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The common meal fare for the typical college freshman: Ramen noodles. Cheap (less than .99 cents) and easy to make but not very nutritious.

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Since the advent of Swiffer products, homes have been somewhat cleaner (unless you have a maid who cleans your home), thanks to the line of Swiffer brands. Here, you see one of the new products: Carpet Flick. This cleans up the carpets manually, with some kind of friction suction that picks up stuff. I know it won’t pick up cat hair, though.

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And here’s the duster version. Need to reach 10 feet above you on top of your entertainment center? No problem.

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Now, this product saves me the agony of having to get toilet water on my arms. Just scrub the toilet bowl with this product and you have clean toilets.

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In a hurry to eat lunch or a snack? Just grab this tuna salad!

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In the fresh produce section, I saw this: already cut broccoli and baby carrots. What’s wrong with cutting the broccoli ourselves?

Sadly…this is what America has become. Lazy, fat, and just eager to find quick ways to cut corners…


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